She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
