Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Randomize
