So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Randomize
