so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The struggles of a small town man whore
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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