I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
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