once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
