i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Randomize
