Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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