is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Randomize
