we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Randomize
