Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Randomize
