i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Randomize
