Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
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