if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize