Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Randomize
