at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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