Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
