Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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