Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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