He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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