His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I need to align my fucking chakras
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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