like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
