Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize