once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
