My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
and you fell through a lawn chair
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
