is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
