is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
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