Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
