chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize