So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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