Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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