you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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