you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
