My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
