Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Randomize
