the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
