You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
