the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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