Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
