I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
