I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
