he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
