It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
