Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
