carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Randomize
