he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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