You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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