dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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