I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
