Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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