Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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